Hit My Kid and You Won’t Need a Lawyer

PARENTING PRINTABLE: Speed Limit 25 — Hit my kid because you’re speeding, you won’t need a lawyer.

PRINTABLE of a Street Sign that says, "Speed Limit 25 – Hit my kid because you’re speeding, you won’t need a lawyer."

*Clearly I’d never advocate violence as a solution to ones problems. That said, if some idiot hit our kid because they were speeding… well, what would you do?

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  1. I would hunt them down, pitt their car with my own, punch through the window, pull them out by their throat, rip their arms off, & beat the other driver to death with the bloody stumps, but then I’m a roller girl, so violence is in my nature!

    1. Per my footnote above, you know I’m not suggesting one commit violence against other people, but were I to witness you beating the driver to death with said bloody stumps expressing your unhappiness with their actions, I might experience temporary amnesia if asked. 😉

  2. Do anything that hurts my kid because of your negligence, and you won’t need anyone any more.
    Love this Michael! Thanks!

    1. Thanks, Mary Kathryn. I saw a sign someone had hand drawn like this, and decided to make my own. if the local police find them taped up around our neighborhood, I’ll deny any knowledge. Might want to cut off the part with my blog’s URL at the bottom?

  3. I might have lost my shit recently and threw a shoe a speeding Prius on my street. And when I say “speeding” I’m talking 60 MPH in a residential zone.

    I might have watched him come to a screeching halt, skidding and screaming and scared that his car had been dented because there was a might thump when the converse made contact.

    He might have threatened to have me arrested and I might have taken that opportunity to beg him to go to the police so that he could explain his speed and I could get his full name and make sure to publicly shame him. I might have threatened to kick his ass and even though he was 100 pounds bigger than me he still might have been scared.

    But all of that doesn’t cast me in a very good light so I’m sure none of it is true.

    1. Okay, I really just laughed out loud, Jessica. I don’t blame you a bit for doing what never happened. 😉

  4. Suing them or trying to pull any legal action is pretty much a useless waste of time these days. If anyone did harm to my children, lets just say that I would be guilty as charged when it was time to go to court for sentencing. I am not one to advocate doing violence to another, but all that shit would go out the window if my kids were hurt by some knucklehead in their car, not paying attention. I would hope the police would understand, but the reality is, I would be spending some time under adult supervision for a long time….if I got to that clown before my wife did. Have mercy on that poor soul and their entire family if my wife got her hooks in him/her before I did! 6 o’clock news would be like a scene from the Crow. An entire city in flames!

    1. 6 o’clock news would be like a scene from the Crow. An entire city in flames!

      I hear you, Will. It’s hard to imagine what one would do in a situation like that. Let’s pray we never have to find out. Oh, and I liked your comment how much worse it’d be for the idiot that hit your kid if it was your wife that got to him first.

  5. Where can you buy one of those signs?

    1. Feel free to download the high resolution copy of this sign and have it printed. 🙂 http://bit.ly/ZA7sOj

  6. Why is your kid in the street?

    1. Where did you play when you were a child?

    2. Have you ever heard someone say that where there is a rolling ball, there’s usually a running child chasing it. I 100% agree with this sign. I want one for my house. I’m in the same situation as this guy. My neighborhood is a cut thru from one main road to another. It’s like a speedway some days. And the worst part, sometimes it’s people that live in this neighborhood. Makes me sick! I would put a beating on someone if they hit my kid, regardless of the consequences.

      1. I hear you, Tom. I’ve thought about looking for a new house on dead end street with no thru-traffic for just that reason. That’s bad enough, then throw in people texting while they’re speeding past our homes and it’s a recipe for disaster. Grrrr. [Michael throws up his hands and crawls back under his rock]

  7. “Why is your kid in the street?”

    When I was growing up in our small rural area we rode our bikes, roller skated, etc etc on these streets. Everyone knew your name. I’m just a stone’s throw away from the home I grew up in a few decades ago but things are much much different. Its just not like that anymore. And then we lived off of a paved country back road.

    Now I own a home on a gravel lane that comes from one of those roads. People go every bit of 60 mph down this lane. My children should be able to ride their bikes with their neighborhood friends. I should feel safe sending my child to check the mail at the end of the lane where the mailboxes are. Hell, I have been nearly hit while walking my dog. People go so fast around turns and everything they can’t see whats in front of them. its ridiculous.

    1. Right, Teri? Somehow my brother and I survived childhood, sometimes riding our bikes many miles from home. Playing in the street was the norm in those halcyon days of my youth. Honestly I don’t know if it’s really more dangerous now, but it does seem like it?

  8. Is there somewhere I can actually buy the street signs? I would love to get these up at my corner. We have a stop sign but nobody actually stops and I think this would really catch a eye!! Thanks

    1. I just mocked this up on Photoshop. I’d not be surprised if someone sells something like this, though. Sorry I don’t know of a source. Appreciate your comment!

  9. Hi, I love this sign!
    I need one that says, “If you hit my kid because you refuse to stop for their school bus, you’re not going to need a lawyer!”
    Thanks for making these signs printable!!
    Summer Miller

    1. Hi Summer! You are very welcome. Gotta say, I was really nervous out with a gaggle of young kids on Halloween the other night. Some drivers just don’t use good sense. Not the time to be speeding through dark neighborhoods. 🙁

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