Kids Say the Darndest Things was an TV series hosted by Bill Cosby in the late ’90s. Kids, however, aren’t the only ones who say funny things. Here are 10 recent tweets by parents, famous and infamous, that prove at least some of us have kept our sense of humor, if not our original hair color or sanity.
Not sure how to feel about this. My daughter's class just put on a pageant about The First Black Friday.
— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) November 30, 2013
I haven't taken my kids to a pumpkin patch this year, but it feels like I have because of Instagram.
— Wendi Aarons (@WendiAarons) October 27, 2013
Say this to a child. 'Your eyes might be that colour now..but we won't know your adult eye colour until your baby eyes fall out.'
— Cheish Merryweather (@TheCheish) December 27, 2012
We don't use the #ElfOnTheShelf to guilt our child. She's already creeped out that Santa sees her while she's sleeping!
— Michael Schmid (@adaddyblog) December 3, 2013
Just passed a store that sells "Everything You Need to Spice Up Your Love Life." I thought it was illegal to sell babysitters.
— Sandy Rustin (@SandyRustin) November 24, 2013
The toddler's 6, 7, H, 9, 10 never fails to make me smile. Except today when she did it and then jumped off the couch.
— Kristen Chase (@thatkristen) November 26, 2013
Me: You sound like a broken record. 3-year-old: What’s that? M: It’s an old type of CD. 3: What’s a CD? Me: *moves into a nursing home*
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) November 11, 2013
Just saved $25 on a flu shot by having my 7-year-old sneeze in my face.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) November 26, 2013
My kid told me she knows Santa isn't real because she Googled it.
— Stephanie McMaster (@Smethanie) November 30, 2013
My dad: "Can Anna have hot chocolate?" Me: "Only if she eats breakfast first." Dad: "Okay. She's having Goldfish." Because, grandparents.
— Suburban Snapshots (@SuburbanSnaps) November 26, 2013
I’m a 42-year-old man, but if I see a stuffed animal lying on its face, I will still move it into a seated position so it can see.
— Jason Sweeney (@sween) November 4, 2013
At what age should you tell your children they're going to die in The Hunger Games?
— Sid Karger (@SidKarger) December 1, 2013
I can't recall the last time I felt 100% well. I'll take The Joys of Motherhood for 500 please, Alex.
— Scary Mommy (@ScaryMommy) November 22, 2013
According to Oldest daughter's teacher, she needs to try harder listening to instructions. Or something like that.
— Mere (@Does_This_Match) November 27, 2013
Which tweet is your favorite? Leave a comment or tell us about any parents you follow whose tweets and quotes we may enjoy. We all need as many smiles as we can get, right?